TENNESSEE WHISKEY

How my hopes came and left
That cool winter’s day
And despite constant efforts
My love would not stay.
She drove a dagger into my heart
Not once stopping before she did part.
She held everything I once had owned,
From my cares to desires and even my car.
She stole it all, it was quite bizarre.
My shirt, my socks, actually my draws
Hey, ain’t there something against this?
Like maybe some laws?
Up and left was I in Tennessee
Now all I have is a bottle of Jack D
I pour shot glasses, six to the top
Damn I’m only seventeen, and here comes a cop.
He grabbed and clenched under my elbow
I was like: “hold up, hold up, let me go.”
He said “Son, we got laws in this town
And your future I cannot let down.”
Ready was I, “Sir hasn’t your heart been broken?
Used, mistreated, spent like a token?”
“Actually it was,” he came to recall
“She was gangly, fat, and tremendously tall
She broke my heart, so I broke her jaw.”
“Now sir, I imagine that is against the law.”
That is when it all went down
And my head and stomach began to spin round.
“Son, I’m your uncle and your father
Hell, it’s Tennessee, don’t even bother!”